Lolito, by Ben Brooks.
I was questioning my choice of this book in the beginning and up until about the middle of it, but then I fell completely in love with it in the backend. I’m still unsure of its classification—whether it’s Y/A or not—but its vulnerability completely seized me around the 36th chapter and maybe a little before. It caused me to question the nuances that are sometimes found in power dynamics and abuse, and how the very nature of loneliness can make those nuances obsolete when the promise of a warm body and a listening ear is just on the other side of it all. I’m attracted to these kinds of stories specifically for some reason (I know the reason): how malleable our convictions become when our loneliness pressurizes around us; how thin our beliefs can feel in our hands when we realize we’d do anything to feel the heat of another one. And then how tender we become right after a heartbreak. How open and accepting we are for anyone and anything, and how that openness can lead us into places we never imagined we’d go. I’m just so attracted to it all, and I guess that’s why I loved this book so much. A high recommend (if you can get through the teenage-ish writing).
And honorable mention to the way the protagonist’s parents were written! Their love was so beautiful. I loved it all.